Behind the Curtain

Auditioning for How to Succeed…

What’s Going On

In the 2022 Toastmasters International Speech and Table Topics Contest Vicky Lyle and Ankita Roy, both members of Innsbrook Toastmasters Club, advanced from the District 66 Area 26 to Division B this last weekend. Hooray!

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you. “– Maya Angelou

How Can We Better Serve You?

We’ve been publishing this newsletter for several years. It is essentially a digital magazine. Every now and then we’ll run an ad like the one below promoting Tess Scott’s book, Listen, Sister!

I was talking to a friend, Heather Brekelmans, the other day lamenting our inability to think of products, services, or events to bring to our readers’ attention. She suggested we ask you what products, services, or events might interest you besides the stories, quotes, and storyteller profiles we currently include in the newsletter. We’d appreciate it if you’d give us some feedback. Books, workshops, travel; whatever opportunities you’d like us to search out and promote.

Open Kimono – Should you choose to click on a link and purchase we’ll be making a commission off the subsequent sales.

We look forward to your input.

Featured Storyteller
Pam Rambo

Pam was a dismal failure at ashtray making in first grade pottery class. To further shame her family, she was a charter member of the turtle reading group and unable to successfully solve for x in seventh grade. If SOL tests were given back when she was in school, she’d have been SOL.

In a bizarre turn of events for a dyslexic kid who hated school, Pam went to college and stayed there for thirty years. They never asked her if she had learning differences; she never revealed that information. (They can’t take a degree back, can they?)

Focusing on the natural gifts of students and helping them realize their dreams, Pam started a successful educational consulting firm in 2010. When she is not busy helping students succeed, she entertains audiences with tales of the education dark side.

She can be reached at 757-903-6511 or [email protected]

Check out her story, Queen of the Second Row.

Auditioning for How to Succeed…

By the summer of 1974 I had been making my living as an actor for a little over a year. I’d entered and left an Actors Equity union apprenticeship program in Manassas, VA and flown to West Palm Beach, FL to stage manage and act in a production of Guys & Dolls directed by Joe Davis.

Joe had cast me in my first two professional shows when I was 15 and 20. I thought I had secured a gig with another theater in Palm Beach and had flown back to Richmond expecting to return only to receive notice that theater’s opening was being postponed. I also learned that the theater had been working for had folded and apparently I was the only member of the cast who had collected their pay. Everyone else’s paychecks had bounced. I had cashed mine at a small bodega before I flew home.

Shortly after returning home I was recruited to help open another theater and was cast in their second show, The Girl in the Freudian Slip. I started working construction again and was cast in their fourth show, Neil Simon’s The Star Spangled Girl.

It was late August and my parents were vacationing at Virginia Beach. Momma called me to say she’d seen an audition announcement for How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying. I had seen the show in NY a few years before when Joe Davis had directed it at the Equity Library Theatre. The audition was scheduled for the following Monday. My play was running Wednesdays through Saturdays and I decided to drive down to Norfolk and audition.

At that time I drove a 1967 Plymouth Fury III that I had bought for $600 from a little old lady who didn’t drive anymore. It was a big car, wide enough to stretch my 6’1.5” frame out in the back seat with a trunk larger than some of my actor friend’s NYC apartments.
I worked on a jobsite from 7:30 that Monday until 4:30. Rushed home, showered, changed and took off for Norfolk. Half way between Bottoms Bridge and Williamsburg on an isolated stretch of I-64E the car broke down. This was long before cell phones, so I thought I was out of luck, but eternal optimist that I am I stuck out my thumb and the first tractor trailer that came along stopped and gave me a lift. When I told him where I was going and he said he was going right by there.

Ten minutes before the auditions were scheduled to begin he let me off at the corner and I walked in the door drawing a significant amount of attention. Partly, because I was wearing navy slacks, a red gingham check button-down-collar shirt, and an off-white silk sports coat. But probably because no one knew me. Who was this stranger?

I signed in, let them know I was there to audition for J. Pierpont Finch, the lead, and took a seat waiting my turn. As I sat there I checked out my competition. I love the music from the show and I was enjoying listening to the auditions. Some people brought their own sheet music, but most were auditioning with songs from the show, as I intended to.
When it came my time, I told the pianist I would sing Brotherhood of Man, the shows big finale number. I got up on stage and began to sing. I immediately began to wonder if I wanted to work at this theater. The pianist was struggling. She hadn’t seemed to have had problems with other auditioners’ material, but she was butchering my number.

At this time in my career I’d never had any professional training beyond the six weeks I’d spent in the apprenticeship program. All my training had come from my high school drama director, Betty Griggs, and my high school music teacher, Betty Davis. Mrs. Griggs had taught me how to command attention on stage and Miss Davis has taught me that the accompanist followed me, so I just committed to the song and prayed the poor piano player could keep up. Within moments she found her stride and I was very happy with my audition.

As was the director’ as I was offered the lead. I explained I was doing a show up in Richmond and wouldn’t be able to attend rehearsals for another three weeks. We worked out that I would drive down and rehearse Sundays, Mondays and Tuesdays until my show closed and then I’d move down to Norfolk. The producer offered to put me up at her house until the show opened and I could find a place of my own.

I then explained how my car had broken down and somebody gave a lift to the Trailways station and I took the overnight bus back to Richmond. My parents had returned home and Daddy drove me down and we arranged a tow truck to bring the car home.

Everything went smoothly after that. I finished the run of The Star Spangled Girl. I drove down on my off days, rehearsed, and moved down finishing rehearsals. The show opened to glowing reviews. I wound up renting a room from the pianist. One thing led to another and the pianist and I became intimate friends.

This woman was one of the most accomplished musicians I had or for that mater have ever met. One night she confessed that the community of actors who worked at that theater were a very close-knit community and that prior to my showing up everyone had thought that the guy who ended up playing Bud Frump, the comic foil, was going to be cast as the lead. So, when I, a ringer from out of town, showed up, she decided to sabotage my audition. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out the way she anticipated. In fact she said, within moments the only person who was looking bad was her and she decided to straighten up and fly right.

It never crossed my mind that anyone would have tried to trip me up like that. But it didn’t matter. Mrs. Griggs and Miss Davis had taught me well. Eventually, I received a BFA in Theatre from VCU. I went on to study with some respected acting teachers and extremely accomplished musical directors. But the training I got in high school laid the foundation for my career in the theater and as a public speaker, and now as a storyteller.
Both Bettys are singing with celestial choirs these days. They may be gone, but they will never be forgotten. Not as long as I live.

The pandemic postponed my high school’s fiftieth reunion. On April 29th, Thomas Jefferson High School’s Class of 1970 will turn 70 and we’re gathering 52 years after we graduated. I intend sharing this story and singing both Betty’s glory.

Listen, Sister! Finding Hope in the Freakshow of Life is a hilarious collection of short personal stories that turn awkward memories into much needed encouragement. Each tale of real-life shenanigans points out glimpses of God in the everyday and directs women to the source of true joy in their stress-filled lives.

Listen, Sister! Finding Hope in the Freakshow of Life is launching June 14, 2022.
You can pre-order it here: Listen, Sister!: Finding Hope in the Freakshow of Life by Tess Scott, Paperback | Barnes & Noble® (barnesandnoble.com)

I Want to Hear from You

Please send us your feedback about the kinds of products, services or events you’d like us to promote at [email protected]

Til next time,

Gayle Turner
Executive Producer.

A Quiet Voice

What’s Going On

We’re refreshing the website; there will be new storytellers and stories. We’re going to start publishing the newsletter content on the Blog.

And we’ll start offering Stories Matter Workshops again.

I shared my Celebration of Women story from last week at Innsbrook Toastmasters this morning. We are running hybrid meetings and besides our local Richmond members we have folks from Texas, Pennsylvania and Australia tuning in. It’s after midnight in Australia when they join us. I’m flattered.

Today’s story is an important piece of American history. Barbara Johns and the fight to end segregation.

“I love short stories because I believe they are the way we live. They are what our friends tell us, in their pain and joy, their passion and rage, their yearning and their cry against injustice.” – Ann Lamott

Shirley T. Burke

Mrs. Burke was a force of nature. Her generosity, care and compassion for others was summed up in the question she asked herself and others every day. “Have you been to Selma today?”

Check out her story about Viola Liuzzo, the only white woman to be killed during the civil rights era.

Shirley T. was taken from us way too early. We miss her, but her memory comforts all who knew her.

A Quiet Voice

In 1951, the schools in Virginia were segregated. They operated under the concept of Separate, but Equal. Except the schools were not equally funded. The schools black children attended were pathetic. They were poorly maintained, and ill-equipped. Still, the teachers, and parents strove to educate their children, all the while praying that eventually the American dream of all men (read people) being equal would one day become reality. Prince Edward County’s black schools were some of the worst in the state.

On April 23, 1951 Barbara Johns, a quiet 16 year-old, led a student strike for equal education. The officials said they were truant. There were truancy laws on the books in those days that would have allowed the police to arrest them. Barbara and her fellow strikers wrote to Oliver Hill, a black attorney 60 miles away, up in Richmond asking for his help. Mr. Hill later said that when he and his partner drove down to Farmville, they intended telling the children to go back to school. But after meeting with Barbara and her fellow students and becoming convinced they had the support of their parents they took the case, and filed Davis v. County School Board of Prince Edward County. This was one of the five cases that were combined to become Brown vs Board of Education of Topeka. The case that ended racial segregation in American public schools. Davis v. County School Board of Prince Edward County was the only court case brought by students.

This was an extremely brave action. The KKK burnt a cross on Barbara’s family’s lawn and her parents sent her to live with her uncle, Reverend Vernon Johns, in Montgomery, AL. She graduated high school, went on to college, and became a librarian.

Not a lot of attention has been paid to the courage of these children. Few people talk about the children when they talk about Brown v Board. But that’s being rectified. Every state has two statues in the U.S. Capitol Building’s The National Statuary Hall Collection.

From 1909 until December of 2020 one of Virginia’s contributions was a sculpture of Robert E. Lee. The plans are to replace it with a statue of Barbara Johns.

A quiet young woman whose courage will inspire generations of Americans to come.

I Want to Hear from You

His-story or her-story, the point is if we lose our stories we lose ourselves.

Share your stories with your family, your community, and your colleagues.

Tell me a story at [email protected]

Til next time,

Gayle Turner
Executive Producer.

Celebrating Women

What’s Going On

I’m in the third week of working The Artist’s Way @ Work. The Artist’s Way has two principal tools. The Morning Pages where you start every day writing three handwritten pages. And The Artist’s Date aka the Time Out where you spend an hour a week refreshing your creative inventory.

Last week, I visited an exhibit at the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts here in Richmond. The exhibit entitled, Spirits, is a curated collection of the Tibetan artist Tsherin Sherpa’s work.

I was so inspired I returned on Saturday with Marie, and I expect to return again. At first, I was off put by the imagery, but as I read the curator’s comments and re-examined the paintings I was delighted with the artist’s wit and insight’s, not to mention his technical mastery.

Bruce Birdsey accompanied me the first time and I think a significant part of my enjoyment was the conversation the exhibit provoked. At the end Bruce said he was going to have to hire me as his life coach. Obviously, the work is intoxicating.

Another member of our Artist’s Way group is Rebecca Taylor. Not the fashion designer, not the museum consultant, nor the young English graphic artist, our Rebecca is a painter and collagist. I have a piece of her work looking down on me as I write this. Check out her blog Art Unabated.

Tonight, the RVA chapter of Coming to the Table will be holding one of its twice monthly meetings.

Danita Green, the Co-CEO of the RVA chapter invited me to tell a story in honor of International Women’s Day

The illustration is a poster for Women’s Day, March 8, 1914, demanding voting rights for women designed by Karl Maria Stadler (1888- after 1943)

And don’t forget, March is Women’s History Month.

Today’s story is the one I’ll share tonight.

“People will forget what you say and they’ll forget what you do, but they will never forget the way you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou

Featured Storyteller – Shelli Jost Brady

(she/her/hers) – – A business owner, social entrepreneur and servant leader since age 29 – – is a divine being of a certain age that has focused her essence, efforts and energy on creating place and belongingness for all of humanity since the dawn of time. Check out her story, Do You Know What You Want to Be.

Celebrating Women

I cannot possibly list all the things I like about all the women I like, so I’ll share a few stories about one woman in particular, my mom.

Momma was gracious and kind, she was all sweetness and light as long as you did what she wanted you to do, when she wanted you to do it.

She had exquisite taste and she dressed like a fashion model always appearing to have her act together.

But Momma was not to be crossed. I remember when I was three or four, I did something in public that upset her. She stooped down next to me and oh so quietly whispered, “I’m not going to embarrass you the way you’re embarrassing me, but when I get you home… I am sure I must have straightened up and flown right for the rest of the outing. I say this because I’m still here.

Mom was an inerrant judge of character. She used to tell me I could do anything I put my mind to and that she never worried about me, because she knew that I knew the right thing to do and she had no doubt I would behave accordingly.

As an example, although I was their only son and capable of achieving anything, the barre was set pretty low. There were only three benchmarks. I was to graduate high school as no one had every done that in the family at that time. Second, I was not to drink alcohol until after I graduated high school, as alcohol was a problem in the extended family. And third, I was not to worry if I got a little girl pregnant as Momma and Daddy would raise the child, because Momma told me and I quote, “I will kill you.”

Both Momma and Daddy instilled an irrational sense of self confidence in me, but it started with Momma. As early as five years old I can remember her turning to me and asking my opinion. She asked me my opinion so often I would be surprised when it wasn’t sought.

She used to say she hated making decisions. Long after my dad passed away, I remember her saying, “Your father liked making decisions, and I let him make everyone I wanted him to.”

Daddy and I loved puzzles and mysteries. We would always guess who done it, but Momma never cared. She’d always say, “I’m not smart that way.” And yet, her last few years at the phone company Mom became quite the detective. After decades of being a clerk, she was challenged with solving customer billing complaints and Mom became a veritable Dick Tracy. She would dig through files and chase down stray facts until she solved the problem. Puzzles mattered when they impacted people.

And this was recognized, in fact, she once had a problem with middle management. A VP heard about the problem and after listening to both sides he told her manager, “Settle this to Marguerite’s satisfaction. She is the kind of employee we want around here.”

Ironically, Mom always said she had no self-confidence. That she wasn’t up to the challenge. I hated it when she put herself down.

Regularly, over the 29+ years since Daddy died, she would lament, “I don’t know why God took you father instead of me. He made such a contribution to this world.”
For years I would say, “I don’t know mom.”

For the last three years of her life, Marie and I were Momma’s primary caregivers as dementia whittled her away. I began to add, “I guess I still need a mom.”

I came to realize that indeed I needed to learn compassion. I needed to learn how to sit with someone in pain and just be there. To accept that I couldn’t fix what was wrong, but to stay there by their side, nonetheless.

Momma passed away last July as I sat by her bedside, stroking her back and telling her, “It’s ok, you can let go, Buddy’s waiting for you.” And as we say down south, she finally gave up the ghost. Two weeks later, we interred Daddy’s and her ashes together in our church’s memorial garden.

I imagine the two of them sitting side by side on a garden bench, holding hands and watching over us.

One of Mom’s frequent admonitions was, “Gayle Turner, it is not what you say, but how you say it.” Reminding me of Maya Angelou’s, “People will forget what you do, and they’ll forget what you say, but they will never forget the way you made them feel.”

No one whoever met my Momma forgot her. She smiled and hugged pretty much everyone she ever met. I am not the only one who walked away from my mom feeling better about themselves.

So, here’s to the smart, strong, and courageous women in our lives. Wait, that’s redundant, let us celebrate the women in our lives.

I Want to Hear from You

Let me know your thoughts on Jennifer’s story.

If you don’t want to put your thoughts in writing, drop me an email and I’ll send you a zoom link or phone number and you can tell it to me.

Drop me a line at [email protected]

Til next time,

Gayle Turner
Executive Producer.

A Tool of the Trade

What’s Going On

Celebration! I won first place in the District 66 Division C Area 31 Table Topics Contest Saturday morning. Next Step is the District 66 Division C Contest on April 9th. For those of you who don’t know, Table Topics is extemporaneous speaking. The contestants are given a topic and the speak for one to two and a half minutes. I thoroughly enjoyed myself.

“Whatever the reasons, we do not pursue emotional development with the same intensity with which we pursue physical or intellectual development. This is all the more unfortunate because full emotional development offers the greatest degree of leverage in attaining our full potential.” – Bill O’Brien

Featured Storyteller – Jennifer Einolf

An accomplished speaker and Executive Coach Jennifer uses story to help high achievers aspire and attain even greater success. Click on her picture to watch her story, The Dreamer.

A Tool of the Trade

This is not a story. This is a short explanation of a tool I used as a salesman, a leader, a copywriter and that I know scriptwriters use, particularly for TV.

It’s sometimes referred to as Personality Profiles or Communication Styles.

Human beings have ben classifying each other sense antiquity. The Ancient Egyptians believed our hearts were the center of our being and that our personalities were controlled by the elements: Earth, Wind, Fire, and Water.

The Ancient Greeks came along and said “No, the brain is the center of our personalities and the influence of bodily fluids upon it determined our personalities. This theory held sway through Shakespeare’s time all the way into the 20th century when Freud said, “Nonsense, your personality is determined by how your mother treated you.”
This argument over the influence of Nature versus Nurture continues to this day.

Although, genetic research has shown our proclivities are recessive genes passed on from our grandparents. Probably nature’s way of keeping us from killing our young. If they were just like us we’d have to live day-in, day-out dealing with our flaws.

Starting just after WWII the mother Daughter team of Myers Briggs began analyzing the records of GIs and found patterns similar to the ancient understanding of distinct communication tendencies. People tend to fall into four categories when it comes to absorbing information and making decisions.

We’ve learned two simple questions to help discern these differences.
1. Is the person task oriented or people oriented?
2. Is the person high assertive or low assertive?

From the answers we create a simple 2×2 matrix.

In the accompanying graphic I’ve color coded and named the profiles.

The High Assertive/Task Oriented person is Red/Fire/Director. They’re interested in Results and have a keyword when they want those results, NOW. They make decisions by parsing their options. Give their options with the accompanying pros and cons and they’re in their element.

The Low Assertive/Task Oriented person is Green/Earth/Compliant. They’re interested in Experience and Proven Processes. Their keyword is HOW. They believe there’s a RIGHT Answer. And they have tried and true processes for discerning that RIGHT answer. Ask them about their decision-making process and then support it.

The Low Assertive/People Oriented person is Blue/Water/Supporter. They’re interested in relationships. Their keyword is WE. They are consensus builders.

The High Assertive/People Oriented person is Yellow/Air/Initiator. They’re interested in FLASH!: first, most, newest, best, cool stuff. And they have two keywords: ME/WOW. They respond to testimonials from people they admire or incentives.

The majority of first marriages are across the axis. The Directors attract the Supporters and the Initiators attract the Compliants. And over the time the differences that were charming can become annoying. The differences across the axis create drama and that good storytelling.

Let’s take a look at Seinfeld. We have Elaine as a Director, Jerry as an Compliant, George as a Supporter and Kramer as an Initiator. The easy plot conflicts are between George vs. Elaine and Jerry vs. Kramer.

I seldom consider the profile of characters when I’m initially creating them, but when I look to heighten the conflict I sharpen their profiles.

Take a look at your favorite TV shows, movies, and novels. See if you recognize the characters’ profiles.

Better yet, think about Friday night across America. The Director asked their Supporter spouse, “Where would you like to go for dinner?” And the Supporter wishing to be considerate asks, “Where would you like to go?” The Director is now irritated because they have delegated this responsibility and the Supporter is not executing their task.
The best way to handle this would have been for the Supporter to give the Director options. We could go to Joe’s. I know you like their food, but we will be their in the morning for breakfast. We could go to that new sushi restaurant you mentioned, but it late and we may not be able to get in and I know you hate having to wait. Or we could just order a pizza. It’ll be here in half an hour and you’d have time to shower and we could have a relaxing evening at home.

The key is for the Supporter to pick choices they’re happy with, and whatever the decision everyone is happy. Directors may not know their options, but once presented with their options they are champs and making decisions.

Across town the Compliant and the Initiator made their plans earlier in the week. The Compliant made sure not to have that cuisine for lunch and everything is going smoothly until the Initiator pos up with, “You know where we could go…” And now the evening is ruined. The Compliant frets because the Initiator is unhappy. There’s an easy fix. The Initiator only has to say, You know where we could go next week?” And now the Compliant has an entire week to plan and look forward to another delightful evening with their honey.

I’ve used this tool in sales, leadership and in my creative endeavors. Let me know your experience.

I Want to Hear from You

Let me know your thoughts on Jennifer’s story.

If you don’t want to put your thoughts in writing, drop me an email and I’ll send you a zoom link or phone number and you can tell it to me.

Drop me a line at [email protected]

Til next time,

Gayle Turner
Executive Producer.

Up in Smoke

What’s Going On

Spring is here. I can see my favorite flowers, daffodils, blooming in my neighbor’s yard across the street.

This past weekend, I started an Artist’s Way @ Work group. We’re meeting at a little Thai restaurant during the off hours on Saturday afternoons for the next 12 weeks. I started wring my Morning Pages on Sunday, so I’m getting up when I used to rise to walk and am doing my walking in the afternoon. My calendar is crammed full of activity.

Starting this week, I’m adding another feature to the newsletter. I’m going to start including a link to a video of a storyteller.

Today’s quote is by a fellow named Bill O’Brien. I love the quote, but the only Bill O’Brien I know of is a football coach. If anyone knows where this quote came from I’d appreciate your letting me know.

Featured Storyteller – Shanna Kabatznick

Shanna celebrated her birthday recently, so I thought you, my dear readers, might enjoy listening to her story.

You can check out her bio and watch her story, How Did I Gt Here? by clicking this link
https://storytellerschannel.com/shanna-kabatznick/

Up in Smoke

Back in 1983, Richmond Theatre Company was touring the play Key Exchange by Kevin Wade. The image is of the movie poster. I couldn’t find a copy of our poster, which if I remember correctly, I liked better.

We performed in several locations around Richmond including hotel banquet rooms and my favorite in the auditorium of Fox Elementary School. Fox is located in the heart of Richmond’s Fan District. The neighborhood is bordered to the east by the academic campus of Virginia Commonwealth University, to the west by The Museum District and the north by historic Monument Avenue, famous of late for our finally taking down the statues to the Confederate Civil War generals that were erected during the notorious Jim Crow era to let black people know who still ruled The South.

We loved performing at Fox. The stage fit our needs very well and most of us lived in the neighborhood. One of the stars, Gordon Bass, lived right across the street. This was particularly convenient, because every night after the show we’d have to strike the set, carry it across the street and store it in his basement. It was easier than loading it into a truck and taking it back to the carriage house we operated the company from in those days.

Years later, I worked on the crew of the movie True Colors with John Cusack and James Spader. Several scenes were shot at Fox. I was member of the set dressing crew. The Director of Photography wanted to shoot a shot down the hallway and he wanted the ceiling lights to be visible in the shot. So, I was charged with lowering all the lights. This was not a complicated job. I had to disconnect the lights, then add a couple of feet of chain. Then I had to splice wire from the junction box in the ceiling, thread it through the chain and attach the wire to the lights.

All the lights worked, the DP was happy and when it was all over, I had to reverse the process and restore the lights to their original position. From 1990 until 2008 I lived within hearing distance of Fox and every time I heard the fire engines drive by, sirens blaring, I would say a little prayer, “Please Lord, if it’s Fox, don’t let the cause be an electrical short from my rewiring.”

Saturday morning, February 12, 2022, I was awoken by Gordon Bass calling to tell me, “Fox School burnt down last night.”
My heart aches, at the same time I can breathe a sigh of relief it wasn’t my handy work.

The school was built in 1911 and is integral to the community.

Word has come that they plan to restore the school. Meanwhile the children will attend virtually for awhile and then attend Clark Springs Elementary, which was being remodeled and will be allocated for the Fox refugees during the rebuilding.

The building went up in smoke, but the memories persist.

I Want to Hear from You

Let me know your thoughts on Shanna’s story.

If you don’t want to put your thoughts in writing, drop me an email and I’ll send you a zoom link or phone number and you can tell it to me.

Drop me a line at [email protected]

Til next time,

Gayle Turner
Executive Producer.